Thursday, July 7, 2011

An Ignorant Insight To Ideas on the "Creator"

The greatest philisophical question, that may never be answered in our lifetimes is "how did we begin?" Did we start as single celled organisms, evolving again and again, into what is apparently the dominant species on the planet? Or did we hail from some unseen force, who distinguished us from the start? Perhaps it was a little bit of both, even? The answer is os mysterious, yet much more important then one can imagine. If we knew how we began, the abilities it could present us may be infinite. If it was evolution, what makes a cluster of molecules into a cell? If it was a god, what force did he use to spark life into us? (And for the record, many people use the argument that theyd rather come from a god then be related to a cockroach. Well id rather come from the essence of a star and be related to a nearly invincible being, cockroach, then be offspring of millenias of inbreeding.) I am ignorant of the cause of life, and I humbly accept that either course deserves credibility, in that evolution would explain how we become what we are, and a deity would explain the spark that makes conciousness. This idea is not meant to demean either side, but propose an ignorant idea to be argued, and more then likely, corrected. Perhaps there is a "god" and perhaps it is not what the world believes it to be.

The average human has five incredible mediums of senses, in that they Extend to an incredible range broadly, but when looking at a focuses sense, it falls short to some more humbles competitors. Our eyes see far, but the hawk can see beyond us, and bees can even see in ways we can only imagine through technology. Our ears, though sensitive, cant compete with the ears of a dog, or their nose for that matter. Though with our medium of senses it becomes apparent we have a grand ability toward interpritation. Any animal can interpret its surroundings, its true, but it takes some degree of intelligence to use our interpretive powers to menipulate the world around us, in other words form technology. The most incredible gift i believe interpretation has brought us is the ability to differentiate life from the unlively. We've found life in the most incredible places, where it can range from a small swamp to the edges of underwater volcanoes. In just a centuries time the requirements for life has expanded exponentially in the ways of temperature, consumption, and geographic neccessities. Life, is without a doubt, a phenominal thing, and I believe it is too unique to be burdened to just one planet. If god is a concious being, why would he stop with just us, after all?

Though the key to life, is unexplained and, so far, only witnessed on Earth, the components for life are abundant in the universe. Every atom of our core has descnended from a long destroyed star (which in my oppinion is a far mor noble bost then saying we descend from inbreeding), and the stars and planets are inifnite across our universe. To say it only exists in our little spot in the universe, or even multiverse, is absurd. Carbon, the key component to life on Earth, is astounding in its abundance, and we know of its incredible durability. The question is not what components make life, but what sparks a concious mind. This is where scientists have failed to find answers, and where Believers in god fail to find the secret in scripture. A notable conclusion, though one I would hate for science to find suitable, is that there is infact a "god", if the only requirements to be a god is to create life that is.

First of all, I would like to say im not promoting or demoting the belief in a deity. Though God has satiated many loopholes in science, From Newtons exceptions in his Newtonian laws, to Einstiens argument of "Gods and cards" or however I should put his quote. Both men were astoundingly brilliant, and their concepts of god I find nothing less then intruiging, especially Einsteins few witty quotes. However, where these men failed to find an answer beyond God other, more humble scientists, found the asnwers in science. Its astounding how the fame of saying god is the answer far outreaches the eventual, physical answer.

The answer that has not yet been answered, yet I'm still humble enough to say will eventually be answered by science, is the spark of life. The immediate answer is a god, so until light is shed I will accept that, but I will still wonder on what makes a "god". If the requirement is the ability to create life, then its more logical to assume god is a Monolith, from the book/movie 2001: A Space Oddyssey. In this sense, the thing that created life could have been a series of rare electromagnetic waves that radiate clusters of molecules into life. If you think of god as this, it explains how the molecules get conciousness, and it raises new levels to the requirements of life. No longer does it have to be carbon-based, it can just be radiated. To credit Star Trek, imagine in a million years getting into a bar fight with a silicon based life form, in some far-off space hub. True or not, id hate to be the guy who tried to give a heap of rocks a black eye. Of course saying god is radiation still leaves a question as to why there is no non-carbon-based life forms on our planet. Another ignorant inferance to answer that, is the Radiation came from a rare comet or space anomoly, and simply spewed an ancestor to Archabacteria onto our planet. A far off as that sounds, I still believe it is just as acceptable as a mono-theological deity of infinite preportions. But lets not jump the gun just yet, to interpret something DeGrasse Tyson, my favorite astro physicist, once said, we must know when we're looking too specifically at one point, and when to back up and take it in from another angle. Sadly I don't remember his exact words, but im certain it was for more insightfull then the pitiful excuse for wisdom i just spouted out. The point being though, I feel that taking it to the level of claiming it was a form of asteroid with carbon-based life and radiation right off the bat, is a bit too extreme without some, more credible, sources for reason.

The next Idea I will cover, though not extensively due to my previous essay on it, and the fact I simply cant see the knowledge as useful beyond a few stoner-loved talks and a funny "fact" is the idea of us living inside of a computer simulation. As Morpheus once said "if real is what you can touch, smell, or see then real is nothing more then electrical impulses interpretted by the mind". Essentially, there is a 20% probability(humorously the same percentage of people in America who DO NOT have herpes, and yes I do use that often) that we live in a highly advanced computer simulation, for one reason or another. It would then explain physical anomolies as glitches rather then yet-to-be-defined laws. I doubt it would exactly be like the matrix however. In a less awesome probablity it would be like the Pc game The Sims. We're small bits of programming controlled by an outside source, using the computer..does anyone have an urge to throw a party and get a lodtof flamable furniture? (inside joke for all you sadistical sims players) This simulation could be for a number of reason, including study of lifes beginnings, in that our intelligence is such the dawn of a higher understanding, or just for fun, like a computer game. And it is indeed probable, that the computer could be turned off at any point. lets hope they saved the program! If you seek more explanation and insight on this, read my earlier writing "The reality of reality". As far as im concerned though, we are real, but every possibility deserves some voice.

I will end this brief idea of a god theoreticly coexisting in scientific explanation with my favorite idea. Einsteins formula E=MC^2, also known as the "Special Theory" is incredibly reliable and accounts most any answer in the universe. In respect to the genius i follow it as well, and understand it has done wonders for astrophysical theories including such wonderous things, as black holes. The theory, from my naive understanding, covers time in coordination to matter, mass, and energy. It also divides time and space into their own dimentions, creating the universe and know, and usually, love. We have understandable relevance to density, mass, volume, and time, however the theory only covers up to four dimensions. Let us assume that there are dimensions beyond that, and, for the interesting hell of it, that there are beings that can live -beyond- these four dimensions. It is, after all, understood that their are anomolies not coordinating with force, or immediate relevance. i would like to view photons as the most common, and beyond that we have the incredible, and realistic, anti matter. If there are beings living in the sixth to tenth theorized dimensions then they wouldn't succomb to our understanding of time, space, and matter. They would, from our interpretation, be omnipresent, omniscient, and omnipotent. This being, or beings, would then be god. That does not, however, account for the spark of life. If the being exists though, it would have a source of power outside of our own initial power. Perhaps the energy to create life takes a radiation only emitted by these beings, or by incredible energy sources beyond even fusion. Perhaps antimatter, has its own dimension in coordination with our own, and when the particles collide it released energy so potent that, under complete control, it could create the spark of life. Anti matter on its own would destroy most anything but the true ability of anti-atoms is still unknown to us.  For a better understanding, think of Dr.Manhatton from the hit comic and movie The Watchmen. A being of understanding far too complex for us to know, and of power we could not fathom, yet existing with a concious mind.  Its relation to our life would be miniscuel at best, but with such a gaze at the universe perhaps creating a living particle of simple matter would indeed benefit the beings entertainment, much like an owner loving the entertainment his pet gives. Anomolies stay unexplained to us, but explainable through tireless work towards mathmatical answers. Though selfishly i must admit, the thought of such beings existing beyond the fourht wall is Incredible to me, so incredible I wish to believe it, however only in the sense of probablity. Through religious interpretation i find my ideas soured. Its even possible, in the thought that anything is possible, that the universe itself is a living being, and we are but one portion of it. I have to say with that thought our use to it, in relevance to the understanding of our own cells, is so unexplained its quite an absurd idea. I simply like to think of a civilization, or being, that can live beyond the restraints of space and time. THat being, would be our god, even if he isnt the Jehova we have scriptures on

I would like to end by encouraging each and every ready to come up with their own idea for lifes beginning, but to refrain from the closemindedness of a "magical" god. After all, magic is only science yet to be explained. And of course, regardless of how small we are on the scale of a universe, we still exist as living specimen. The best way we can cherish our life is hoping and searching for life outside our own, and live each day knowing its a miraculous event rare in the universe. Understand that none of these ideas have credibility beyond my own education in the matters, which i remind you is slim in comparison to modern Astro Physisicts, but are simple ideas. In truth, I'm no where near a credible scientist like the formally introduced Tyson, or the historicly famous minds of Physisicts, Inventors, and Philosophers. I'm just a young mind who wishes his science fiction entertainment, to be not all fiction, as the coming 21st century has helped with greatly.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011


you were meant to die
yet never meant to fly
you were meant to see the sky
You were meant to dream to fly
You were mean to realize and cry
and then you were meant to die

So I will ask you why
Do you refuse to die
I will ask you why
your mind chose to fly
Why your mind is so high

And while your mind stays so high
can i ask you why?
Why I can not fly?
Can I ask you why?

Why im meant to die
and though however much I try
I will never fly

Yet you were made to try
And to succeed yet always cry
And I reach the sun and fry

Because I dreamt to fly
Because im meant to die
Because you mean to die
yet you never try

May I ask you why
Why I ramble on this lie?
Why I even try
to say I know your why?

May I ask you why
Do we have to die?

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Malcom X of HomoSapiens

I Dreamt of a World
I dreamt of a world...a world not filled with hate, politics, and evil...i  dared to dream of this world...this world that is shunned...this world not ruled by man, but by ourselves... The world did not have politics to lead people, it did not have evil to corrupt people, it did not have violence to worry people, it did not have hate to make us cry...

I awoke from this dream....i wept for the world...I wept because this is the world we get farther away from everyday....I wept because my world was suffering, because my love was suffering, our love. And then I said with a voice so full of furry that it made the angels tremble and the devils shudder and the gods quake with fear, NO MORE.

Look around your world brothers! I pleade for you to see what i have seen, to see the wars caused by our disagreements, to see the plauges brought by our idiocy. To see the politics and propoganda and fears made by our own need for power. I pleade for you to look at this and weep for your world, for the one beutiful thing man kind still has time to save.

Its time for evolution brothers, for us to evolve beyond our own wants and needs and fears, its time for the next step towards evolution to begin! with this simple Message i have given to you all...i plead for you to spread it if you weep for our world. and if you Dream of a better one......

Friday, June 10, 2011

Use Me

another old poem of mine

Use Me
Let me be
A servant to use
for your simple ruse
Let my skills be used for a gain unright
and then let me fall into eternal night
Dont love me I plea
Just let me be
A shell for you
Give me something to do

Use me I, i need it
pay me with a hit
But dont say to me
That youll let me be

Dont Say I love you
dont make that mistake
Cause ill love you too
And my heart youll break

Because your love will so grand
Something too good to stand
Just Say youll use me
and let me be
A man to help you
in a goal to do

Let me be your sexual freak
And give me back a little peak
Into a heart i dont wish to know
Or else love for you will grow

Let me be your a usefull book
Full of all you need, but just take a look
Ill give you the answers to the questions you seek
And I ask only for an answer so bleak

Let me be your shoulder for a tear
Illd hold you and tell you i am near
But dont bleed too much of a broken heart
Ill use the blood for a loving art

So use me
Just let me be
A tool
Your fool

A heart
Your art

A freak
your geek

just dont rip my heart in two
dont make me regret that truly i love you

Thursday, June 9, 2011

A Jokers Paradise

I want what i deserve, and i deserve it all
When its my time to shine, this world will fall
When i meet grim death, right at hells gate
Ill laugh in his face, For he cant stop fate

When the world is angry, and they give me a lashing
Ill bide my time, and give it the worse thrashing
Ill burn this world to the ground
Ill make it suffer, but ill make it sound
Even in space theyll hear the cries.
Finally, ill rip off the humans mask of lies

Ill make them face the fate I hold in my hand
Ill make them see just where they Stand...

And as I laugh at the hell to arise
Youll look at me, and stare deep into my eyes
Youll see a devil, longing for power
And ill see that its my final hour
Ill present you with the knife, to wipe away my sin
Ill kiss you one last time, and youll forgive what ive been

Because even in my darkest hour, when I rip this wretched world in two
I want you to know, i still love you...

Thursday, June 2, 2011

A Brief Summary of the life of a henchman

The Everyday life of a henchmen....
7 AM:Wakes up...brushes teeth...
8 AM:finishes getting ready/puts on mandatory evil guy outfit
9 AM:heads to work/leaves sleeping quarters...
9:30 AM:Spends the next half hour thinking of how life could have been different
11 AM:Issued task for the day...pees his pants when he finds out its to assault super hero
12 PM:begins thinking of what his mom said...about being a doctor
1 PM:Is on guard...probably conversing with other henchmen...
2PM:Catches sight of super hero
3 PM:hyperventalating but overly estatic..slightly freaked out that half of his team mates are dead, but that the hero is caught
4 pm:takes hero to evil villian to hear boring master plan again
5-8 pm:Set to guard Good guy
9 pm or earlier:injured on the job during good guys heroic escape
10 pm:rushes to the hospital, only to find out his Evil Boss was lying about health insurance
11pm:He stil gets treated, however with an amputated arm.
12 AM:Finds out his boss has died...he is jobless....
1:finally returns home to cry himself to sleep....also henchmen dont get many lunch breaks...he was probably hungry too...yes he ate then slept! Maybe he didnt cry either? I mean maybe hes optomistic!

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Hell City Anthology Continues

about the story :its some old 20 stories of anthology I once did and it feels like ages ago...I sort of rushes near the end of it but ill post the orignial story regularly, and then when its done ill begin writing some new stuff..maybe ill redo the anthology and make it better...share your thoughts?

The Assasin
I am death. I grew up in death. Born to a dead mother, a fatherk illed himself in grief. My brothers died from starvation on the streets. Even the little rats which kept me company on lonely, hungry nights had to die..Little bastards only life like two years...Either that or I had to cook them to live..I was born in death so being asked to kill The Avenger wasnt any biggy. I had followed him to some murky bar. I entered into the back door and watched as he approached The one called Knight with a sword..I decided itd be amusing. As he began to position the knife for a swift kill stroke the Knight Laughed..I couldnt hear what they said exactly, but suddenly they began talking about some girl and what? Cross roads? I looekd about the room. One junky in the corner, one burnt out loon in a suit of armor, and another loon with a big smiley mask he probably paid five bucks for at walmart. SO how in the hell are there five dead men at their feet? Crossroads? As I watched I became so distracted..what is it about the crossroads that bugged me when i heard it. As the clock struck midnight my mind had completely forsaken my mission. I walked out to the middle of the street. A business man in a suit and yellow, horn rimmed glasses showed up, offering a hand to shake. I stayed still. "You came..good Robert Lee..Or should i call you by your code name:assasin?" I was perplexed. I tried to ask him who he was but he interupted my question 'Ah, you only get one what do you want?" I thought this man was insane..but something inside my head compelled me to listen to him and do as he says...What do I want? I want to avoid the one thing that haunts me..I want to avoid me..I want to avoid death..He handed me some paper, said mark the X. Half of me didnt believe him, but the other half couldnt help but move my hand over the paper. And just like that he vanashed, walking away into mist. I turned around, and stood face to face with These masks..The Avenger and The Knight, both seemed to notice what had gone on, as if they knew the man all their life. Like a childhood friend, except the childhood friend you screwed your lfie up and made you want revenge, yea. That friend. Hell I could take em right? I couldnt die...God I wish I could..I drew a blade and tossed one at each of them. the Avenger Bounced it away with his own knife, the Knight, old and frigid, took it right in the torso. Too easy, right? The Avenger now stood over his fallen comrade, and gave me the perfect chance to take him out. Death beats all, even those who always succeed, it will claim this just as it does the losers in life. Avenger was both a loser and a winner. He lost his friend that night, but he won his life for that moment. I fell to the ground in horrible pain, it felt as if someone was drilling into my skull. I cant die though...So there I lay, burried in a coffin. My nerves to my body completely disconnected. the only thing im able to do is wish I never made the deal..

The Woman:
Im Rebecca Parsons. My team called me Snow. Twenty years ago I was hot stuff, now I just want to see my friends again. Is that so much to ask? Can the dealer make me another deal or can the Doctor simply let me go? SHIT. Can I just get a drink? There was one among us who never took a name, nor did he ever share his own. We just called him the hero, he always seemed to know what to do to get us out of the Situation. He just somehow knew..He let us escape once from the mental hospital, god knows what happened to them. The deal i made: for this team not to be together. Well perhaps it wasnt the best wish. While we were in the hospital, and after we escaped I loved them. I loved them all. You can call me a whore or a slut and I know it wasnt right but. I couldnt help myself..anyways that was a long time ago. I still love them all. As I sit in a cage with this Insane Doc bastard rambling about some "special core" I only have one thought..I only want to see them again...maybe theres a soft spot in hell for us. Thats the best hope I can have now..if god can see it in his heart to at least let me suffer with them..but I dont even deserve that, after what I let loose...Now I sit here...waiting for a hero..or a monster

The Doctor:
Im impressed. I sent the assasin not to kill them, I knew he would fail at that. I sent him out to test them. I am Doctor Aushivan. Twenty years ago I worked at a mental institution, where I stumbled upon a set of special patients. One patients Mouth we had to staple shut, it seemed no matter what he said people would listen to him..Another patient seemed to always delight in the situation, for christ sakes he somehow always got liquor in his time. Another kept talking about vengeance, while an older man always told him it would be alright. The next block over we had a gambler, no matter what risk he took he always seemed to come out on top. Always made a profit, and for some reason people were simply compelled to go with it. He practicly won most the patients medication. When I tried to confiscate it I couldnt help but make a bet with him, he came out on top..Lucky bastard. I was not quite sure of the speciality of the last male, but a certain female seemed to charm these six men in ways id never seen. She was Nostalgic, romantic. Even I wanted her...I got her too..The night they broke out I had my way with that woman. Perhaps that was the edge that caused them all to escape. I couldnt help it, i had to show her that I loved her and she loved me..I had to force her to see. And god she waas beautiful. That was twenty years ago..since that night I lost my liscence to practice. They may haev taken away the paperwork but I was never more inspired to look into these bizarre people. The monst interesting occurence however; the girl was pregnant. The bastard child could have them all as a father, anythings possible with this bunch. I spent the next twenty years in the city, tracking them down. tracking down my love. The child called for me. And for the last twenty years since its birth it has layed in a tank, isolated from the world so I could watch it grow. Sometimes I fear it, sometimes I am proud to call it my bastard son. The possibilites are endless. And when he broke out in furry, I looked at him with pride almost, as my child had developed power I had never seen. As I bleed to death on this wall, i na ruined laboratory; the woman freed and my scientist helper dead I am filled with pride, that my legacy has such an impact..

The Scientist.
That idiot doctor is proud of what he made. He has no idea the cotastrophe which is unfolded. I am but a humble scientist, I have worked with my team on this child for nineteen years. In nineteen years he had done nothing, and then the Doctor had to go after that woman. With her incarcerated I dont know what set the boy off. These monsters which the Doctor "helped" have..powers over others. She must have called to this ragtag team. Misfit bastards they are..But I dont knwo what came over me..I stared at the bastard monster and something inside me told me to let him free..When he was free he spoke for the first time in nineteen years. he told me it was okay..he told me to put the gun to my head. He told me to pull the My body fell limp..I somehow still thought it would be okay..

The Hell Hound
I am you. I am they...Twenty years ago I was born, thanks to that womans wish I existed between seven individuals. I am the hound that works for the dealer. I want what he wants, he was the father of these seven afterall. And I am their Achetype. I am them. Twenty years ago they were banded together, these hell hounds were close and one because they thought as one. I am that one they thought they split up my power weakened, but hope was born. A child, Bastard son to them all but one. I exist inside him too..Hell, I am him. Though inside the others I had little control, I could raise this childs mind. be his guardian. Tell him when it was time to leave. When I sensed the coming of those seven, their dark reunion my power was once again strong enough to help my help me..As long as they are together, and as long as that woman thinks of their bond I will only increase this boys power, in ways they never dreamed. I only hope, they have joined with the one I cannot sense..The Devils Misjudged Deal.

The Avenger(3):
The bastard killed The Knight! Oh well..if he died that means he died least it wasnt me who had to kill him. But I in some way, to blame for his death? No. I got no time to think about that. My adreniline is still pumping, and before this night is done much more blood shall be shed. With a new take on the vengeance...My son...My comrade...My god damn conviction! my beliefs! If they take my vengeance..I only have myself to blame..I need this. Something in my head told me where to head next. I had to find the boss. Before the knight died he told me that if the stakes are high enough hed come find me. Bull...I broke into his base, its location somehow ringed clear as day. One by one, I killed his men. Petty gang members, they cannot kill me. Their sorrow is too few..Only One of my team mates has that power. So Slive after slive, chip after chip I gambled on this and won. Ill take the elevator to the top floor. The Boss always did have a kick for the highlights. Im curious though as to why the elevator wont work. I look out the side of the glass. A man stands there, mouth stapled shut. Dear god Rick..what did they do to you?

The story of the boy who cried demon

someone said it in a byond game called Phoenix Sundered earth XD so i thought id finish it!
Twas a long time ago! Many ages! Probably more then YOU willl ever know existed! (so one plus whatever age you are) There was a boy! A little boy! Who, like normal boys, dreamed of gum drops and ice cream! And like most normal boys he owned an xbox, which evolved his dreams from gumdrops and ice cream to Gun shots and icing! a hoe that is!
Once the boy was asked to guard heaven! seems pretty stupid to leave a boy to guard heaven im sure...but ya know what? Your a jerk...know why? Cause you just HAD to point that out huh? Jerk....if your a jerk then your stupid...maybe your the boy? Anyways if you need an excuse the last guardian of heavens gates was fired for incompetence so they were left with a kid! Better? Good! lets get on with it!...jerk....
One day the boy was SOOO bored! And like any small boy he decided to pull a prank on heaven! and He cried "DEMON DEMON!" as loud as he could! and everyone came running, because if a demon was at heavens gate then all the horrible apocolyptic signs were to be happening! It was a big deal! so big infact it was not to be joked about..the apacolypse started prematurely! and The second coming came! Then the earth was sreigned down upon by fiery and god-like vengeance the likes of which no one had ever seen! And up in heaven many a person was  judged and sentenced...the world had met its end..maybe a few survived...but that was all...
Anyways the boy told the crowd after all the commotion was over "False alarm everyone!" and they decided to forgive him cause...come on..jesus was leading the crowd and he forgives EVERYONE...why do you think hes not the judge of heaven? I mean hed let anyone in! Freakin goody two shoes...but hey! He forgave him! Well the next day Jesus was sick in bed! And the boy was guarding the place yet again! and he so wonderfully called out "DEMON DEMON!" and the second apocolypse happened, flooding the corpses of earth with an infection that made the dead walk with the living..the zombie was born...and only a few remaining humans fought off the plague..others hid in underground bunkers never to see the light for a hundred years, as nuclear arms were set off to destroy the zombie invasion..
Will the dick-head boy who thought this was funny had a good laugh, then when everyone came running they were pissed...and he was sent to hell where Satan sent him to double hell! For ruining his plans of domination before hand by making the angels aware that demons could invade their gates....
The moral of the story...never EVER shout out the word demon around angels! those guys CAN NOT TAKE A JOKE! also the kid was a jerk..dont be a jerk...

Hell City Anthology Part Two

The Scum
The bastard came out of nowhere! Fuck a part of me was glad to see him, the other part knew what he wanted. I worked with the team back in the day..My wish on that night: To have fun. This may sound common but all I could do was have fun. Killin myself aint fun, couldnt do it. If getting shot isnt fun, wont have that. Back then I torched down an entire city and laughed at every single puppy dog eye and moan and sob I got. It was somehow euphoric...and Her..Oh man...She was so fine...he body screamed to me..And rejection isnt fun...I got a taste of the woman of my dreams. I was Her love, I know it! But hey..that was twenty years I work for The Boss...Everyone deserves a last meal right? Mine:a shitty pizza and cheap beer, while some gutter loving junky eyed me down..For some odd dont know how it happened. Being stabbed isnt fun. Maybe it was the whiskey then..I dont know how I came to let down my guard. Before I knew it I was face first on the ground the broken glass my face landed next to reflected a bloody smiley face..I laughed as it whispered to me "Soldier, special Corp. Dishonorable Discharge; betrayed by his people..We go back a long way Jim...Having Fun?" He laughed, I started cracking up a bit myself, thought it was an old friend pulling a gag..that is until I felt the sting of a blade go into my calf...Not very fun...I began to get to my feet, this type of wound may cripple a normal man, but being crippled isnt fun is it? So why was I laughing? "Back then..." the smile muttered "we called ya the took delight in every dirty deed you did. You remember that code name? Here..I knew that wouldnt really hurt you..take a drink.." He handed my a half empty bottle of some murky liquor. I swished it down before nailing him in the face for stabbing me. Looking back I should have thought how odd it was for the Avenger of all people to let his guard down for that. He kicked back behind the dumpster, the dirty junky seemed asleep so we had some alone time, talking about the good ol days. Talking about the horrific hell fires, the screams, the training, the funny man at the cross times..We got to a point where he wanted to discuss The Boss..I was shocked, that was the one man I knew he wanted vengeance on..he was however, My Boss now too...I knew i shouldnt have told him all i did but for some reason it told him I didnt know where he was, but I knew where an old friend who worked for him is. Before we said our goodbyes though he turned to me..and the smile on the mask seemed smaller then the sick smile he must have been hiding.. He held out his knife..."Thanks for the memories old friend..." He said in a gleefull tone "But they arent memories I care to remember..." In one quick jester I found a knife inside my stomach..As I began to lose vision I saw something on the floor next to the damned junky..Molly...I had been drugged bad...I passed out I had one last thought.."This"

The Knight
My codename was The Knight back in the day. I attacked that town in chainmail and a sword. I had been trained well in many arts of combat, and though my work with the government had proved questionable, i never thought theyd ask as such without good reason, then betray us when the chips are down. After I escaped the mental institution I spent the next twenty years of my life curled up inside a bottle, drinking away the horrors as bessed I could. So there I sat that night, in a damp, dark bar. It was already a bad night, some weird looking junky eyed me at a table in the back. As he did Some asshole punk came up to me. They asked me why I was dressed in a knights suit with a sword. As they laughed I told them to piss off. Ever strike a bees nest? They were five men to one worn out man in a suit. They struck the hornets nest. The one to the far left, with some awesome skull tatoo swung a fist to me. The idiot his the armor and busted his hand. I sighed as I got up...They jumped when they thought they had the chance to, two seconds later there were four dead men in eight equal, bloody parts. As I turned around smiling at my work, it seemed one of them was smart enough to point a gun to my mouth. "This was it..." I thought.." I happy?" as I flashed back in a cliche memory clip to the story of my life the man dropped to the ground. It seems some fried hole was in the back of his head, I looked around, I saw no one who seemed to be my ally..Why did they kill this man? Its a question I still wonder in my grave. as I sat back down in the bloody mess and poured a new drink, a Big, yellow smile waved to me...

The Avenger(2)
The Knight...One of the few of my old comrades I dont want to stab in the head. Too bad I sorta have to. His deal with the dealer was by far the oddest one..While we all asked for the poweer to win, he in turn asked for his last thought to simply be a happy one. I guess with the horror we were about to cause, he knew it would be needed. Im bewildered at the moment though. Here I sit next to a raggidy old "knight" in a run down bar covered in blood. Least I got to see him again. Least I got to see my mentor. As I approached him with a tear in my eye, knife drawn, he did not try to defend himself. "Ya know Chay..Im happy.." I paused.."heh..lookin back...she loved me didnt she?" Rest in peace taught me what I needed to were the only good man out of us all..

Reality a Fantasy (feel free to comment your own oppinion)

                                      The Reality Of Reality
                                 Do we live in our own head?
"Cogito Ergo Sum; "I think therefore I am"( René Descartes). The reality in
which the Human Brain rebels is constantly interrupted by ones own thoughts.
You cannot cease self controlled thought beyond sleep, in which case thought is
still constant and reoccurring. However thought itself can be justified as
responses to interpretations made by the human brain. In turn, it can be inferred
that if dreams can be created in which the character we play believes such
scenarios to be real, we, in turn, suffer from a delusion which we believe to be
real. Imagine back to your most in-depth dream. In this dream a character you
followed was portrayed, along with other scenarios, by your own mind. You
controlled such a scenario in a sub-omniscient view, however what could happen
in such a dream is still able to stimulate some degree of shock to yourself. As
humans we are gifted with the unique ability to create our own interpretation, and
in turn our own world. However, is this truly able to be called freedom, or slavery
to our own design? (Osho Dhammapada Volume 9; Canning, Bard "The Death

  “If real is what you can feel, smell, taste and see, then ‘real’ is simply
electrical signals interpreted by your brain.”-Morpheus. In our current reality our
body is the vessel of an endless amount of nerve endings and signals. An
Electrical impulse, when interpreted by the brain, can mean pleasure for one
man then pain for another. When broken down, reality becomes two main points
of stimuli: Electrical stimulation, and the way our brain interprets such.
Therefore, electrical stimuli influence brain interpretation, which influences
stimuli in the next scenario our body will endure(eating, fighting, loving, buying,
etc.) If our mentality is truly slave to its self-determined responses there are few
scenarios in which our conscious mind(ourselves) can take:We can rebel against
the mind by resisting our own instinct of what to do and not to do, we can
attempt to exceed such capacities through mental highs, or we can accept such
delusion as a real enough truth. (The Matrix, 1999; Canning Bard)
  Tyler Durden once stated "The things you own end up owning you.." Think
of this past simple material possession such as electronics, store bought
appliances, and Ikea. You not only own your material possessions, you own the
love you've been given by others, the rank in your job you've earned, and the
dignity you've left yourself with. All These attributes contribute to what you do on
a daily basis. You hope not to burn down the house so you turn off the stove;
you hope for promotion so you brown nose your superiors; you may look in the
mirror and credit yourself because you do not want your pride jeopardized. The
inevitable truth behind this is that your possessions, whether mental, spiritual, or
physical, are compelling your actions. If you take this concept and imagine reality
as stimulation then your mind creates rewards, punishments, and possession
which drives your own delusion. Of course Tyler Durden was a delusion of the
Main character in the book Fight Club his words still ring a reality. In turn, the
only way to rebel against your delusion is to rebel against the society you see.
This, however, does not need to mean burning down your house and quitting
your job. Since the beginning of time there have been those who stood up
against society for better, or for worse.(Chuck, Palahniuk Fight Club 1996)
  In the 70s civil rights activists flourished to combat the "reality" in which
they had to live in. They combated the accepting nature of man by attempting to
change the reality around them. Though heroic this concept can only be
acceptable if you see anything wrong in society, and choose to rebel against
them in "realistic" ways. You do not need to picket and march however, Stan Lee
of Marvel Comics combated injustice by writing comics, his "X-MEN" were also
his opinion and take on civil rights. To affect the outside world he created a
dimension which reflected natural problems in supernatural ways( Meigs1997;
55)This is but one proof that by bending reality in his mind, by going with the
imaginary flow, one can change the outside world.
  However noble the quests of these activists were, other activists could
include dictators such as Gengis Kahn, Modern-Day Kim John, and the ever
memorable Adolf Hitler.Though their methods were questionable at best, the end
result was taking their ideas and attempting to make such a reality in reality.
Even if you don't think of reality as nothing but mental interpretation, there is no
end to imagination; and if that becomes reality there is no end to the power of
what you can imagine.
  Your imagination can prove fierce, so much so that Jhonen Vasquiz
(Creator of Invader Zim and Johnny the Homicidal Maniac) and his associates
would sometimes phrase it as "That little monster." Jhonen however was an
artist and comic book writer, and let his destructive monster free in realities he
would know he created. By making comics and cartoons he let his "Monster"
Free for a stroll, without affecting "reality." In fact, every fictional book, movie, or
story comes with its own dreamland, free for conscious creation; Be it Sin City,
Gotham, or even Hogwarts. In Conclusion to his pathway, if you do wish to rebel
against the ideas of reality you can fight the society you see before you, or
create your own. In either scenario however consequences will follow, whether
real, fake, good, or bad.( Vasquez, Jhonen "A sleep deprived introduction"
You may interpret that choice as still being under the omnipotent control
of instinct and subconscious rationality. However much truth this can hold, it only
determines that one truly cannot control their own mentality. If you cannot control
however, perhaps you can excel beyond it. (Canning, Bard)
Every culture includes religious ideas, a land beyond land. It could be a pit
of fire known as hell, cloudy abyss known as heaven, a cycle of reincarnation
and inner-truth. Though they can be argued as delusions in our reality, arguing
our own reality only justifies their ability to be true. If religious land can be truth
however, so can images and hallucinations. If a bent reality from drugs can be
true then, Ego Death becomes its bible.(Walter Houston Clark,"The Psychedelics
and Religion" 1970 )
Ego death is not true death(if true death exists in this philosophy), it is
best defined as....."a sense of being controlled by frozen block-universe
determinism with a single, pre-existing, ever-existing future. Experiencing this
model of control and time initially destabilizes self-control power, and amounts to
the death of the self that was conceived of as an autonomous control-agent.
Self-control stability is restored upon transforming one's mental model to take
into account the dependence of personal control on a hidden, separate thought-
source, such as Necessity or a divine level that transcends Necessity"-
Anonymous. In Ego Death one will most likely succumb to an out of body
experience, in which consciousness travels beyond physical coil into a realm of
which they have no control, except for interpretation. You could end up in a
destroyed city, a forest burning black, a hive under invasion, or anything; it can
all be beyond what you thought imaginable as well. To succumb to this realm
one must give up on self-control. whether they know they do or not, that is the
concept behind the death of the ego; the death of the need for self control.
(Walter Houston Clark)

Attaining Ego Death requires controversial means, for the most part. It
usually attained by allusiveness such as lsd, DXM, shrooms, DMT, etc. If such
acts don't suit you it is also said to be reached by meditation. One can attempt to
"Pry open" their "Third eye" through meditative process. Whether through
hallucinogens or deep meditation the state known as Ego Death is hard to attain,
and can vanish almost as quickly as it becomes apparent. Ego Death and drug
trips are but a few means to stretch your mind beyond reality, however. As the
authors look for control in the dimension you can be the audience, accepting the
words presented for fun. Movies and stories show a in-depth differentiation
between our world and another, almost like a split universe. Infact, if the quotes
of men such as Morpheus and Tyler Durden can ring true, its possible their
emotions can affect your empathy as well. In short, seemingly artificial scenarios
can affect your superficial emotions and stimuli. In such a case, you have
exceeded your own reality by stepping onto the edges of another, while obeying
the laws your mind laid out as well.(Walter Houston Clark;Kaufman, Carolyn  "A
Primer on Archetypes and the Collective Unconscious")

Ergo, escape from our dimension does not have to be by some physical
mean. In extensive thought however, the perception gained through such mental
means is nothing more then perishable adventures our mind creates. In this
sense our subconscious mind truly does control us, however it is also agreeable
such a mentality is attempting to please our stimulus. The only conclusion
gathered by idea behind resisting and going beyond the mind is such: If our mind
or another truly is creating an omnipresent reality for us, it is doing a righteously
powerful job to keep us entranced. The Ultimate Ultimatum behind the concept
of reality not being truth, is to go with the idea as truth. Georgle Orwell's most
powerfully message is "Power corrupts" however perhaps it goes beyond
something as simple as society. If you gained omnipotence over your own mind,
it is improbable that you'd experience the same pleasures that of a common man
would. You would be able to bend the concept of "reality" and even transcend
the mental law of death, however with such free will over will the game of life
could become meaningless.(Canning, Bard)
'Have you ever had a dream, Neo, that you were so sure was real? What
if you were unable to wake from that dream? How would you know the difference
between the dream world and the real world?”-Morpheus. In examination of this
philosophy it is likely that a human would want out of the dream world. This
promotes the one flaw and true beauty in being a human; irrationality. In the
concept that the reality you see is a dream you can wake up from one would
want to awake undoubtedly, however in the dream we feel we are given the
stimulation of food, water, love, hate, pain, pleasure, and the luxury of most
anything our mind allows us. In the reality which can extinguish this "dream
world" it is likely to be a hell. "Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent
one.”-Albert Einstein. If you ignore human nature to rebel against design, you are
left with a comfortable coma of wonder, just as real as any reality could be.
Perhaps this is not the point such fictional and real men tried to make, but the
argument I give you as such: Consider reality you live In a creation of your own
imagination; if your mind gave this purgatory of bliss and pain it is obviously
meant to be entertained with your own actions. To rebel against this system is
simply another way to go along with it, and to try to rise above it is only extending
its walls. (Canning, Bard)
Scientists have determined a 20% probably factor that the world you live
in is a dream world, a simulation for some reason we likely do not want
knowledge of. If it is such, will it affect your life?(Bostrom, Nick "Do We Live In A
Computer Simulation?" New Scientist/00 month 2006)As you read this closing
statement keep in mind, it could simply be your mind telling you not to rebel
against your system; however, it is science to determine truth, and science is a
gift of man. Whichever way you choose to interpret this world, you still will have
impact, and your consequences, whether real or imagines, will be determined.

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Hell City Anthology Part one

Hells Metropolis Anthologies: A town that was brought to hell. Its main heros being nothing more then warped kids and tattered memories.

The Dealer:
The Boss may run the gangs, The Junky may run the lowlifes, the Avneger May run the chaos, but I run this town. I am the dealer. Its what I go by, its what I went by. I've always been the shadow behind man, given them what they seek. When an end to WWII was saught, it was me who dealt the final hand and gave the U.S. the push it needed. When Julias Ceaser needed to be assasinated it was me who stabbed in his back first. The mystery behind the kennedy family, the conspiracies in the back of your head, that one bad event in history that you may be thinking about right now: All me. If you see me as a murderer though, my hands are clean. I never once pulled the trigger, I only gave people what they wished for. I only dealt them the hand they wanted. I Am the Dealer. I Run this town...

In this situation though, I had seven comrades wish upon my help. I dealt them all what they sought and hoped for. I gave them survival, and I gave them the power to accomplish what they had to. That was twenty years ago and I still remember the blood soaked streets, civillians screaming, and the Metal they all got for slaughtering so many...Its even a bit sick to me, but I only give them what they seek. I am the Dealer. I run this town.

The Kid:
My dad was in the army. He never told me many stories, but the scars across his body told it all. The burns on his legs told the tail of how he rescued civillians from a great explosion. The cut on his right arm was gained from protecting a foreign General from an assasin attack. He is a true hero! But the one scar that always gets me is the bullet hole in his chest, that he earned when his team mates betrayed him. Well, I wanted to be like dad; an undercover hero! Fighting crime and protecting the innocent. All I was thought was an idiot...Dad sometimes muttered some words about " hour" The mental institute they imprisoned him in didnt seem to keep his spirit from forgetting how all this began. I was eager to know but first I had to prove to my dad what I could do. I got into his closet and found some old halloween costume. I put it out, and like dad I decided id start like my dad did, at midnight..Fighting the badies. Clothed in some Green Tarp-like suit and a green and black wrestling mask on my face I made my way through the dark streets until i stumbled upon my first criminal. Some bald man assaulting a lady. When I approached them weilding old knife he said one thing :"Let it go man.." I told him to give up and change his ways. When he shook his head I charged at the man, like a mad bull. Well my knife was no match for his gun...a bullet to the chest. The man ran, leaving the girl. and as I laid there weakly inhaling my last few breaths a beautiful woman touched my arm.."Thankyou.." she whispered in my ear, still in shock from her assault. I smiled. Even though I died like an idiot, least I did some good..didn't I? Thats what I thought, but as time went by I learned the truth..I learned just how deep vengeance can go, even if the victim just wants could you?

The Henchmen:
HOLY SHIT! The kid came out of nowhere! I told him to let it go, let me do my business then he charged at me, the only ones who were there seemed to be the whore and some lame Junky who probably thought he hallucinated the whole thing. This costumed idiot had it coming, I had to shoot him! It was me or him! why couldnt he let it go...well I left that spot and the whore bag. I needed to scram before cops showed up, or worse, The Bosses muscle. The only ones there were a junky and a whore, yet somehow someone found me! Not the cops nor the gang, na. This was some nut job in a mask. a big smiley face justl ike the one wal mart has, and a store bought costume I didnt think anything of him, just another nut job I had to kill. I pulled out my gun but damn this guy was fast. Before i knew what was happening I had a knife, just above my kidney..He Cradled me in his arms for a moment, I almost felt bliss. I didnt have to die alone..even a guy like me would accept anything but death alone..He whispered softly, asking who i worked for..I muttered out one bloody word "Bo-ss.." The last thing i remember is a tilted smiley stabbing a knife into my chest..least i Didn't die alone..

The Avenger:
Not a day goes by I dont remember that incident. Burning down a city That had been protesting against the war. It wasnt uncommon but these particular protesters were undermining the government; they had radical training programs and advanced bio-chemical warfare. That wasnt why we killed the town though. We could have shut that operation down and hardly killed anyone, no. Instead the government wanted to make an example of the town, without losing face. A team of seven, including myself, were given specific orders to exterminate the town, while making it seem like the work of terrorists, not soldiers. It seemed unlikely, seven men up against a militia, not to mention the weaponry, policeman, and publicity.The higher ups sympathized, they told us to go to the crossroads at the town square, at midnight. We were told to go to the town wearing some looney super hero costumes and to make a wish involving our victory. It seemed odd but when you work in covert operations you know its best not to ask questions. SO there at that very spot we met a man, who made us a deal. We didnt believe at first, but when seven people burn an entire town to ruins with not one casualty, it makes you believe we got what we wished for. But that was it, afterwords the government locked us up into a mental institution. Luckily one of the comrades saved us, he just somehow knew what to do. He knew "how".. We followed him out and stayed inside the ruined city, watched it rebuild and we each took our seperate turns. My hero and I stayed in touch, we figured that what we had was a power, and we should make sure to be prepaired if its needed for revenge. In the end revenge was all we seemed to have, if we ever stopped to think too long that we killed those people...I don think we'd be able to hold it together. Even if I wanted to though, I couldnt lose. That was my power.."To Succeed"...funny yes but somehow I always do succeed in my missions, be it taking out a town, proving myself as a soldier, or fathering a child. Maybe the charm wore off though, because tonight i got contact from my friend. He said I was dead in an alley..Going to check it out i wish it was me, it might as well have been. As I saw my son lying on the cold, blood stained ground something in me did die..Something said this was my fault..I had no time to point blame to myself, I want vengeance. After tracking down the killer I found the bigger fish..Looks like a reunion will be happening soon, aye Boss?

So here we start

Greetings all! Im the usual kind of guy...a no count kid in the middle of a backwater city, with a public school education and no sense of direction. But like any other backwater kid my mind is something hard to keep up with..perhaps im more insane then I think? Perhaps I'm rather worse off...who knows? Who cares?!? Lets start!